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Would you ask for a divorce also?
Would you ask for a divorce also?
My wife (31 F) and I (30M) have been married for 5 years now. I work mainly in accounting and personal finance advice while my wife is a math teacher at our local high school. Recently I have been researching and preparing to start a bee colony as I have been interested in bees for a long time and have recently reached a place financially where both me and my wife are able to pay bills and have bees. Before I did anything I spoke with my wife about my research and plan to get the bees, at first she had some apprehensions but we talked through them. Once we were both on the same page I found an artificial beehive and contacted a professional beekeeper to help with the bee process and so I began my bee journey.
A week or two later my wife comes home, while I'm making dinner, and tells me she invited a few work friends (all 31 F) over for dinner tomorrow. I say that's fine and continue making dinner until she requests that I move my beehive, the exchange went something like this.
Wife: "While I clean the house would you mind moving your hive? It's an eyesore."
Me: "I'm sorry, but what do you mean by eyesore? It's outside and has plenty of distance between itself and the house."
Wife: "I know, but I want it further back it doesn't match the house and I don't want my work friends thinking I let this house go into chaos when I'm not around."
At this point I had finished dinner and was setting up the table when I asked her, "why is this an issue now? Didn't we agree on the placement before I even got the hive? And besides it's hard to move a hive once it's been placed, where were you thinking of moving it?" She responded that she didn't care she just didn't want to see it. After that we sat down for dinner and I asked again where she wanted me to move the hive, stating that the closest forest wasn't on our property and the second option would be by the back porch. My wife repeated her answer, that she didn't care she just didn't want to see it and we continued on as normal, we ate, we cleaned the house in preparation, did our respective night time routines then went to bed.
The next day my wife and I wake up around 5:00 am, do our morning routines, eat breakfast and head to work. Around 4:00 my wife calls me while I'm still at work, (the high school gets done around 3:00), I excuse myself from a conversation I was having with a co-worker and I go to a quiet corner of the break room. I pick up and my wife starts screaming at me that I didn't move the hive and now her work friends have to see my "hideous" bee hive. I try and get her to calm down by apologizing and saying I forgot and that I can drive over and move it quick, my wife cuts me off and says it's too late and she'll do it herself before she hangs up. I'm standing in the break room confused and angry so I try and focus on my work and deal with it later. I get home that night to my wife sitting at the table reading her book, she welcomes me home and I ask about her day, she says "it was good, a little stressful but nothing I couldn't handle". I then decide to bite the bullet and ask about the hive and how she handled it.
Wife: "Oh yeah! Your bees I almost forgot, it was hard moving the bee hive because the bees kept stinging me so when I tried to set it down it fell and broke so I left it there because it is your hive after all."
Me: "You broke my hive?! How long has it been sitting like that?!"
Wife: "It's been like that since I called you."
I looked out of the window to see my hive laying on the ground, parts of the walls were broken as well as the legs and other crucial parts of the hive. When I took a step outside to get a closer look I saw my bees flying around unsure of where to go, I called the beekeeper contact and asked for a description of the damage. When I told him he said that there isn't much he can do but he'll call a friend to try and fix the things they can, I thanked him, hung up the phone and walked back inside feeling defeated. When I re-entered the house I walked upstairs not even glancing at my wife. I took a shower and cried, my dream of having a bee hive of my own was gone and there wasn't much I could do. When I got out of the shower my wife was already in bed, I crawled in next to her and laid awake for hours questioning our relationship and "if she really loves me why didn't she leave the hive alone?" I have been contemplating divorce as I realized that after she destroyed my hive she has never once apologized nor does she seem empathetic in the slightest, I tried asking for an apology and all I got was "why should I apologize for doing you a favor?" I never asked for an apology since and I'm wondering how I never noticed this behavior from her before and I don't know what to do. Deep down I still love her but she also can't understand why I'm so upset. What should I do?
TLDR: My wife of 5 years destroyed my dream beehive, never apologized and sees it as a favor. What should I do?
