Stop allowing adult male accounts in the chat!!

Should adult male accounts be allowed?

  • Total voters
    27
A

Anonymous_

New Member
Dear mods,

I've registered to the forum after examining the room for a couple of weeks and wanted to seriously discuss about a very disturbing phenomena right now in girls chat - which is the presence of adult male accounts in the chat.

As this chat room is designated for girls, starting from the age of 13, I don't see how it is reasonable to allow 30-40-50 year old men be in the same room with girls at this age and allow them to private message them and God known what else. You are unintentionally making this room be available for pedophilic activity.

I don't think I should mention what those men are capable of and what a traumatic experience they can cause on the girls in the chat.

No matter how respectful they are, this shouldn't be allowed.

Ignoring and reporting is not a real solution. Girls don't always feel comfortable to report those cases, not even talking about dealing with it.

I am familiar with the role that men are allowed in chat, but perhaps it's time to rethink this option.

I want all the girls to think about your own father and try to imagine him going to a room full of teenage girls. And for all the moms out there in the room, try to think about your daughters being in a chat room with adult males - yes, it's a disturbing thought and I don't think anyone would want that.

If you want to keep this room somehow safe and make more real girls join this room, you need to take action on this.

The solution to this is simple -

1. Either separate the room into two rooms - one that is designated only for GIRLS in the ages of 13 to 17, and one that is designated for adult girls (and there you might allow adult males too, and no - adults chat/lesbian chat are not the solutions here)

2. Prevent from male accounts from a certain age to enter the room

P.S

I know there are adult women too that are not better, and of course there are the catfish, but that doesn't mean we should ignore the current situation.
 
Hello!

While the room can have 13 year olds in it, the room is 13+ and not just for teenagers. While you have gone into saying older women can be a problem, you specifically made this thread about males. So first Id like to hit on that point. There are bad people of either gender. Being a male does not by any means indicate wrong doing. In fact, that statement is a bit more on the ridiculous side rather than sensible.

Your mention of having separate rooms for different age groups? Teen Chat and Kids Chat exist for a reason. Enough on that point.

Not that this next point needs much explanation, but limiting age for one gender and not the other is simply wrong and not something I believe anyone would agree on, just no.

Now onto the topic of the younger ******** not feeling comfortable, that way of thinking is VERY far and few between on our room. I take every concern seriously, especially those of the younger group for that specific reason. If they dont feel like coming to myself, thats another massive reason we have moderators closer to the minimum age being that they will have more in common and will be more approachable.

While the room is Girls Chat and its more centered around girl talk, we have had some very decent guys join us, some Ive know for 5+ years and have always been as respectful as respectful gets. To the point they change part of their bio or name when a female states an unfavorable opinion. This isnt something they have to do, they do it to be respectful.

Problems come from all around, there is no one set place where these thing originate. Myself and my watch out for everyone, but again the young crowd gets out undivided attention. Perhaps if you have specific example, you can shoot them to me in my inbox here or in the room. Im there anywhere from 6-12hrs a day.

Have a wonderful day! 🙂
 
I can completely see your point of view but things to take into consideration like Katrina has said: you’re basing this on one gender rather than overall.

If you’re thinking about a situation with teenage girls in one room, are you saying just anyone that is overage? Regardless of their gender.
 
@-KandyKarina- thanks for the reply.

I think you're completely missing the point.
Asking why I'm targeting only one specific gender seems like you're a bit innocent about what's happening in chat rooms across the internet, or about the rate of sexual assaults in general by men anywhere in the world. This might sound discriminating, but that's the world we live in.

As a female I feel much more comfortable around other females, even if they are adults. Trying to explain why shouldn't be necessary, this should be understood.

I've seen enough girls that are complaining about the situation in the room but didn't have the courage to bring it up.

You've mentioned that there are rooms for kids and teens - that's good, are adults allowed there? If yes, than the whole concept of the rooms is not very clear to me.
If no - then there shouldn't be a girls chat that allows all genders from all ages, seems like the room name doesn't reflect it's actual population.

My solutions might not be viable, but that still doesn't mean that it should be ignored.
 
We on this site, regardless of room, understand exactly what the internet has out there hence why each staff member in this site has volunteered to do this for free. Because we are concerned. Ive been in this chat game since I was a teenager, Ive witnessed women be right on par with men when it comes to the bad stuff.

Yes, in those rooms I mentioned, there is a maximum age limit. So, if a person under 18 wishes to be in a room with those only under 18, we provide that. Both room have a wonderful set of staff in them as well.

From a psychologists standpoint, claiming a younger user is scared to come forward (Which you claim to have seen) is them being scared this complaint will be used against them. That doesnt happen. Nobody on my team would do something like that and Im more than confident saying this. Thats a pretty large accusation as well.

In my eyes, this is more of a "I dont like males in a Girls Chat" complaint rather than something of genuine concern. My first reply I offered to work with this, explained how this work, and yet the response I get it "Youre missing the point" and "I shouldnt be ignored". Your concerns are not being ignored whatsoever. The internet is not perfect, people lie, people catfish, and yes at times the internet gets some real creeps. That being said, we are all individuals and shouldnt be held accountable for what some random person does whom we have never had interaction with.

This may not be a response you like, however fairness is what I believe in most and until somebody shows me they are a danger, I dont feel comfortable seeing them as such. If you truly know somebody in Girls Chat who is timid about reporting awful behavior, I urge you to have them contact one of us because as I stated we take the younger ******** concerns serious.
 
**** it, I’m gonna comment because there is so many things I would like to address:

As someone who was a mod in lesbian chat, I can understand why females didn’t want men there, however, basing on your comment it feels like you’re putting the male population into one category and that’s unfair.

Not every male users in those rooms are creeps or there to be predators towards young females or females at all.

Now, I understand that there are some men that do this, which get dealt with accordingly.

If you’re worried about the safety of young users, it doesn’t matter what gender people are, because there is female predators too on both these rooms, then it would be a case of creating a safe environment for young girls to be in, as stated there is teen chat and side rooms that can be created.


But your comment to me makes it feels like you do have an issue with males in general and coming across that males cannot be trusted to be in a room with a female?
 
I’m probably gonna get jumped on for being male and not understanding how women feel, so I would like to point out that I am trans: female to male. I understand how it is to be a female. I’m not biasing this on how I don’t understand how women feel because I’ve never been a woman.
 
@-KandyKarina-

It saddens me to see that you think I'm trying to complain just for the sake of complaining.
I myself can perfectly handle anyone that is trying to misuse the chat for other purposes rather than having a relaxing time, but that's just me. You are in a belief that every person, especially younger ones, has the mental ability to speak up and say what he or she are going through. If you are a psychologist, you should understand that it's not the case.
What I've seen in the room is a fact and the uncomfortableness of the girls is also a fact, you can deny it if you want.

I very much appreciate your work as mods and I haven't tried to criticize your dedication to the room. On the contrary, I feel like this is one of the best modded rooms on this site.
However, allowing this mixture of genders and ages in an unverified room is just a matter of time until something bad happens, and I'm concerned about it.

As this discussion is not going anywhere I recommend to close it, but I was left with a bitter taste

Thank you.
 
ElSerto said:
**** it, I’m gonna comment because there is so many things I would like to address:

As someone who was a mod in lesbian chat, I can understand why females didn’t want men there, however, basing on your comment it feels like you’re putting the male population into one category and that’s unfair.

Not every male users in those rooms are creeps or there to be predators towards young females or females at all.

Now, I understand that there are some men that do this, which get dealt with accordingly.

If you’re worried about the safety of young users, it doesn’t matter what gender people are, because there is female predators too on both these rooms, then it would be a case of creating a safe environment for young girls to be in, as stated there is teen chat and side rooms that can be created.


But your comment to me makes it feels like you do have an issue with males in general and coming across that males cannot be trusted to be in a room with a female?
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No, you're absolutely right, adult women can be a problem too, but as far as I'm concerned (and again, this might discriminating) men are always a bigger problem when it comes to these kind of things.
 
@Anonymous_ If you wish your thread to be closed, you can tag H.R., Kim, Apollo, or Chopper. Though others may want to comment and you might see more opinions or advice. As its your post, its your choice. 🙂
 
Anonymous_ said:
No, you're absolutely right, adult women can be a problem too, but as far as I'm concerned (and again, this might discriminating) men are always a bigger problem when it comes to these kind of things.
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I get that, I really do. However; if you’re wanting to stop predators, it would be a case of where youngsters have their own room or side room to adults.
 
@ElSerto has made pretty much every argument I make on this whenever it comes up in forums.

Anonymous_ said:
You are unintentionally making this room be available for pedophilic activity
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By that logic, every shopping mall in the world is made available for the same activity, since adult males are permitted in them with all age ranges.

Anonymous_ said:
As a female I feel much more comfortable around other females, even if they are adults
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Not questioning your feelings but there are plenty of female pedos around.


By banning males, all you’ll be doing is forcing them to pretend to be females which would be even worse if they are pedos preying on young girls.


Aside from all that, we’re an inclusive place.

The name of the room is a guide really on the topic rather than being a barrier to exclude others (except of course Teen and Kids chat, for obvious reasons). As an example, you can go into Video Games Chat and talk about the weather. You won’t get kicked out for not talking about Dungeons and Dragons.
 
A solution I can see for this is the creation of a side room that was girls only, perhaps even age restricted as we do get female pedos in the room.

yes people can and do make fake accounts thats going to happen no matter if you have girls only of mixed. My experience is that most girls are pretty good at picking up who is fake. Its only when you get a clever perv of the victim of such people is after certain things so blindly they dont take time in getting to know them.
 
The main reason Id love a side room is we do get girls who have had issues with males in their lives. Some feel uncomfortable chatting with a male in room. A side room would be well used by those who are in this situation. Modding side rooms is not big deal too, report function is a great tool.
 
Inkandtatts said:
By that logic, every shopping mall in the world is made available for the same activity, since adult males are permitted in them with all age ranges.
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This is seriously not even close of being the same. I'm not going to start explaining the huge difference between the two.

And sorry, but you've contradicted yourself by saying that in kids/teens chat there's a barrier for a reason, while in girls chat that barrier doesn't exist, although it allows girls in the same age ranges.

ZombiUnicornis said:
The main reason Id love a side room is we do get girls who have had issues with males in their lives. Some feel uncomfortable chatting with a male in room. A side room would be well used by those who are in this situation. Modding side rooms is not big deal too, report function is a great tool.
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Looks like about the only who understands the major problem here, thank you for suggesting such a great solution!!
 
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