Savage roasts/comebacks

I told Elon Musk if I wanted to read **** on my phone, I'd run it through my crack like a credit card reader. I got suspended because his fan boys like to mass report.
 
this one time, about a year ago

i was out with some friends at a local club

when suddenly this monsterous ***** approahes our table

she starts trying to talk me up, & come on to me

so im trying to ignore her, but she jusr wouldnt fux off

so i look over at her, right into her beady little ogrish eyes & i told her

i said *sorry, im not into guys*

& before i turned away she slugged me right in the face & i had to wear an eye patch for a week

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