my first relationship

  • Thread starter Thread starter Deleted member 291924
  • Start date Start date
D

Deleted member 291924

Guest
so yeah hi.
i met my first bf 3 months ago, and we both had a crush on eachother since the start of college.
it went ok but then he cheated on me and then he apologised and i forgave him, he really was sorry. but after that he lost feelings for him and then he lied about loving me so i wouldn't be as hurt which in the end hurt me even more lol.
and he broke up with me on text like a week ago and it hurted so much but now I am learnin to let go of my ex, after a few weeks I am gonna be friends with him again as I still care for him a lot.
I think for my first relationship it went good i learnt a lot from it.
also question... anyone know why my ex wants to remain friends still after he broke up with me?
 
Heathen2002 said:
guilt and FWB
Click to expand...
If he was actually feeling guilty wouldn't he be wanting me back tho? And about the FWB part, Its too early since we just broke up like a week ago we both still might have feelings and it might hurt us both again.
 
Heathen2002 said:
good luck
Click to expand...
Thx. It'll go well I think. He didn't mean to hurt me and neither did I. I suspect hes probably gonna go begging for me back soon lol cos his social circle was really small and tbh I was the only one who even met up with him outside college.
 
astroraiken said:
Thx. It'll go well I think. He didn't mean to hurt me and neither did I. I suspect hes probably gonna go begging for me back soon lol cos his social circle was really small and tbh I was the only one who even met up with him outside college.
Click to expand...
He cheated on you. But didn’t mean to hurt you. How does that work? Also you’re the k my one he met up with outside of college? So he bonked someone in the science lab?

I know it’s tough but he cheated. Cut ties. Move on. Nobody deserves that
 
Finn2.0 said:
He cheated on you. But didn’t mean to hurt you. How does that work? Also you’re the k my one he met up with outside of college? So he bonked someone in the science lab?

I know it’s tough but he cheated. Cut ties. Move on. Nobody deserves that
Click to expand...
Yeah I know its hard and we cut ties for now and trying to move on, we're just gonna remain friends because we still care about each other. I also hurt him but never realised because he didnt communicate to me about it. Honestly, I'd rather stay friends with him so I can make sure hes happy but I know my happiness comes first and I am already working on it. And yes I am the only person he met outside of college because he is really anxious and has asd too.
 
Sorry you’re going through all that. In my experience most people’s first serious relationship doesn’t last and it hurts like hell when it ends. But it actually makes you stronger and better prepared for your next relationship because you’ve learned some lessons, painful as they may be. Good luck 🍀
 
I saw him at college 2day, ignored him and **** but it was hard supressing my emotions. He looked a bit off and he kept staring at me. I think I keep acting happy infront of him he will become jealous and I hope that happens because he needs to know hw much he hurt me
 
astroraiken said:
I saw him at college 2day, ignored him and **** but it was hard supressing my emotions. He looked a bit off and he kept staring at me. I think I keep acting happy infront of him he will become jealous and I hope that happens because he needs to know hw much he hurt me
Click to expand...
Never put on a show in hopes of trying to make an ex jealous, you'll just hurt yourself more and bring about negative energy.

He feels guilty because he was caught and he obviously doesn't value you as a person, just someone to use. If he couldn't respect you and be up front with his feelings because he knew you'd find someone else, what else will he lie to you about? Sometimes the smallest lies are the worst because it shows that a person will lie about anything if it benefits them.

Focus on school and redirect your thoughts when he comes to mind. I had an ex who completely changed on me during college and it hurt but the best thing I did was cut her out of my life and focus on my studies and myself.
 
astroraiken said:
Just hurts too cos he called me very depressing and he told me to go on grindr instead... It's like he never gave a **** and he just didn't like me.
Click to expand...
Better for you to learn and experience this at a young age. Some people never get to even experience what its like being in a relationship like the person who angry reacted to my post for no reason.
 
Boba Fett said:
Better for you to learn and experience this at a young age. Some people never get to even experience what its like being in a relationship like the person who angry reacted to my post for no reason.
Click to expand...
Haha made me chuckle last part. And you are true tbh.
I also knew he loved me a lot in the start but it just turned to **** at the end, I was being fair in terms of forgiving him after cheating and cutting ties with that person and he wasn't really fair with me, I had no chance to really talk about the problems I was causing to fix them
 
Betrayal is the one unforgivable sin. You can forgive many things others do to you, but when you work at building up trust and even give your heart to someone in order to make you feel safe, comfortable and happy and then to have it all taken away in an instant with the other guy cheating on you is painful (duhhhh) but also shows a deep lack of respect and care for you as a human being. It will take time to let go, but for your own sake cut him loose and move on, it will take some time but you will find a good, decent and honourable lad worthy enough for him to be your boyfriend.

Think of it this way - do you really want a person who lies to you, who didn't have the balls to break up with you in person and cheats on you as a friend? Cos that person is toxic and will prey on your emotions and you might get caught in an endless cycle of loving him then getting hurt by him.
 
DarkCookie2200 said:
Betrayal is the one unforgivable sin. You can forgive many things others do to you, but when you work at building up trust and even give your heart to someone in order to make you feel safe, comfortable and happy and then to have it all taken away in an instant with the other guy cheating on you is painful (duhhhh) but also shows a deep lack of respect and care for you as a human being. It will take time to let go, but for your own sake cut him loose and move on, it will take some time but you will find a good, decent and honourable lad worthy enough for him to be your boyfriend.

Think of it this way - do you really want a person who lies to you, who didn't have the balls to break up with you in person and cheats on you as a friend? Cos that person is toxic and will prey on your emotions and you might get caught in an endless cycle of loving him then getting hurt by him.
Click to expand...
Sadly. Altho its the memories that is making me sad, not himself. I do not actually want a person who lies to me and cheats on me, but for some reason I still can't let go. It's just that we shared a lot of moments where I was helping him through a rough time, and that he made a birthday card right before the breakup for some reason?
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top