What’s a "harmless" lie society accepts that actually does a ton of damage?

[Emrys]

I’ve been stuck on a bit of a psychological rabbit hole lately, thinking about how easily our brains accept repeated wisdom as fact. Honestly, I really wish more forums had dedicated sections for Psychology or Human Behavior, because it’s endlessly fascinating to me how quickly we absorb cultural scripts and just run with them, even when our own real life experiences are telling us something totally different. We repeat these sayings without thinking, but when you step back, a lot of them end up subtly messing with people's heads.

I’m not talking about polite white lies like telling a coworker their haircut looks fine. I mean the bigger, everyday phrases or cultural "truths" that everyone takes for granted, but actually do a lot of quiet damage.

A few that came to my mind:

"Hard work is all you need." It sounds motivating, but in practice, it usually just leads to burnout and makes people feel like personal failures when luck or circumstances don't go their way.

"You can be whatever you want to be." It comes from a good place, but it can create this weird existential paralysis or deep guilt when reality sets boundaries.

"Blood is thicker than water." Mostly just used to guilt people into tolerating toxic family dynamics they'd never accept from anyone else.

What’s a "harmless" lie or societal script you think needs to go?

 

[BlackLivesMatter]

If you accept Jesus your soul will go to heaven. Religion is the opioid of the masses.

 

[Emrys]

If you accept Jesus your soul will go to heaven. Religion is the opioid of the masses.

Religion definitely has its share of deep-seated scripts, but I was actually hoping to explore this through a broader psychological lens rather than a religious one! (Full disclosure: I'm Pagan, so dogmatic heaven/hell scripts aren't really my angle anyway.)

I’m more fascinated by the casual, everyday lies our brains accept as normal; things about productivity, relationships, or success that warp how we think. Have you noticed any secular or everyday sayings that do quiet damage?

 

[NavyWings]

Climate change (previously global warming) is an existential threat.

 

[Emrys]

Climate change (previously global warming) is an existential threat.

Interesting pull. The conversation around how that gets framed and how people react to it is definitely massive right now. What makes you view it as one of those societal 'lies,' and how do you see it impacting people?

 

[Killahazee]

I do agree that the blood is thicker than water one is a common misconception I'm all for helping family as I myself am very family orientated but it also makes some feel obligated to help I had this in a similar situation with my cousin and in the long run it did more harm than good, plus depending on the type of person they are they alot of the time rely on your loyalty, and good nature just my personal perspective on one of these from experience

 

[babydolla]

If you accept Jesus your soul will go to heaven. Religion is the opioid of the masses.

 

[Whos_Laffing_now]

Climate change (previously global warming) is an existential threat.

People who believe this are the actual threat. Conservative billionaires have brain washed people into believing its a hoax. These are the same types of people who paid to block studies that linked tobacco to cancer and for years pushed it as a safe habit.

With zero proof, you reject the findings by nearly every world renowned scientist, and trust some trouser stains and podcast morons over professionals. Same issue with covid, and stupidity ended up costing so many lives.

 

[NavyWings]

Interesting pull. The conversation around how that gets framed and how people react to it is definitely massive right now. What makes you view it as one of those societal 'lies,' and how do you see it impacting people?

I'm a data guy. I do it for a living. I have 5 degrees, 3 of them masters, all but one in STEM fields. I understand the scientific method quite well. I understand small data pools over eons of possible data. Measurement error, assumptions etc. I'm all about "show me the data."

The community that ascribes to the lie has taken it beyond just science and moved it into the political. With companies forced (blackmailed) to meet imposed ESG numbers. Companies and individuals forced to purchased carbon credits to offset something that cannot be controlled by man. Companies scale back in order to have sufficient capital to meet the envoinmental Nazis' demands and people lose livlihoods. Some with no real opportunity to move to another field. But who cares? It's just another windmill that will kill the birds the envirnmentalists were trying to save last year. Products get reduced or eliminated because some environmental activist pressured the government to outlaw electric ovens while those same government people outlawing your oven are on private jets happy that the government is paying money to offset their carbon footprint paid for by good old taxpayer. I think you get the jist.