my first relationship

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Kinda realised something... It's called rebound... He is so selfish for doing that, he obviously doesnt give a shi.t or cared about me if he cheated on me. I remember when he said "why go in a relationship if one will cheat?", but proceeds to admit to cheating?? LOL.. He also blamed me as a problem to break up with me :/. And he said he lost feelings for me soon after we got together.. like wtf?? bunch of lies and bullsh.it.. I am angry.
 
Heathen2002 said:
hopefully you can still be 'friends'
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Nah. Def not. I don't want any connection to someone who treated me like this, like sh.it. I still care about him.. But this is disrespectful and disgusting that he did this. Bunch of bullshi.t, lies and fake love. He didn't deserve me. I deserve someone who actually cares and loves me for real. I hope my ex regrets everything.
 
astroraiken said:
Sadly. Altho its the memories that is making me sad, not himself. I do not actually want a person who lies to me and cheats on me, but for some reason I still can't let go. It's just that we shared a lot of moments where I was helping him through a rough time, and that he made a birthday card right before the breakup for some reason?
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The memories are likely to stay with you for a very long time. I still remember me and another lad in school would sneak out of lessons and walk to the back of the school alone for a good snog and see how far we could get our tongues into each others gobs, then months later meeting an older person for wild passionate s e x, it was highly illegal at the time but it felt so good and so exciting. I would still give anything in the world to be with that older person again. It is very hard to let go and it does take a while but once you do let go you will free for yourself of the cycle of pining for your lost love. As painful as it is - it is a good learning curve for the future.
 
Heathen2002 said:
Staying friends with ex's is generally a bad idea. Neither of you will move on.
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This at astros age.

I have been living with my ex for 12 years. But I put that down to just being older because it wasn’t a malicious split or anything like the the topic of cheating, just dwindled apart. Actually brought us more closer than ever. Plus splits the bills-
 
Luka said:
This at astros age.

I have been living with my ex for 12 years. But I put that down to just being older because it wasn’t a malicious split or anything like the the topic of cheating, just dwindled apart. Actually brought us more closer than ever. Plus splits the bills-
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I have heard similar stories of couples in the past. Kudos to those that make a friendship work.
 
I am sure in my case hes wanting to be friends so he can feel less guilt. I am just realy angry that he has been selfiish for being back with his ex from lsat year.
 
astroraiken said:
I cant let go of the emotional connection. It's so hard. Seriously.
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It’s your first relationship. What you’re feeling isn’t love. You weren’t together long enough to even know what love is. That’s the harsh reality. It’s not HIM you want back, it’s a relationship. My advice is to wait and find one that’s real and one that matters. Not one with a cheater who clearly doesn’t give a **** about you.
 
Finn2.0 said:
It’s your first relationship. What you’re feeling isn’t love. You weren’t together long enough to even know what love is. That’s the harsh reality. It’s not HIM you want back, it’s a relationship. My advice is to wait and find one that’s real and one that matters. Not one with a cheater who clearly doesn’t give a **** about you.
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On my side, it was real love. His side... I am not sure, in the start yes though. He was manipulated which doesnt help the fact that he did give a ****. We were together 3 months and Idk if thats long.
 
astroraiken said:
On my side, it was real love. His side... I am not sure, in the start yes though. He was manipulated which doesnt help the fact that he did give a ****. We were together 3 months and Idk if thats long.
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All due respect, but three months into your first relationship as a teenager isn’t enough to know what true love is. First love and true love are entirely different. You’ll get older and grow and realise that
 
I heard he was randomly talking about the breakup without any prior interaction to a friend, which means he is still thinking about me and not over me. He said he was, but it's not true. I also heard he looked a bit down and sad.
 
Also, if I get back with him I am gonna make sure he understands and he puts in a lot of effort, if he doesn't prove it I am gonna split up with him, and move on.
 
astroraiken said:
I heard he was randomly talking about the breakup without any prior interaction to a friend, which means he is still thinking about me and not over me. He said he was, but it's not true. I also heard he looked a bit down and sad.
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...you're going to have to learn the hard way because you are still focused on trying to get him back. You're making up scenarios in your head to try and fill in the blanks like people who think their exs FB posts are cryptic messages made about them.

He could have been talking about the break up to make himself out to be the victim that many toxic exs do instead of taking any responsibility.

He could have been sad, he could have been tired, he could have had really bad gas. Either way, like I said, you're going to have to learn the hard way and sadly, you're setting yourself up for even more heart ache and hurt feelings, possibly worse than when he cheated on you because you're setting yourself up to thinking there's a chance, looking past his actions that showed you who he truly is while clinging to the image you believed that he put on display for you.
 
Boba Fett said:
He could have been talking about the break up to make himself out to be the victim that many toxic exs do instead of taking any responsibility.
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Hes not toxic. He didnt say anything bad, he just said that we broke up... I won't see him till thursday in college, and im gonna act normal so he can get confused.

Boba Fett said:
He could have been sad, he could have been tired, he could have had really bad gas. Either way, like I said, you're going to have to learn the hard way and sadly, you're setting yourself up for even more heart ache and hurt feelings, possibly worse than when he cheated on you because you're setting yourself up to thinking there's a chance, looking past his actions that showed you who he truly is while clinging to the image you believed that he put on display for you.
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You know Im not gonna listen. I prefer to find out the hard way if you wanna say that. About him cheating, he was manipulated and the manipulator also did the same thing to other people. My ex was also high on a substance at the time. He was really sorry and I knew it.
Boba Fett said:
...you're going to have to learn the hard way because you are still focused on trying to get him back. You're making up scenarios in your head to try and fill in the blanks like people who think their exs FB posts are cryptic messages made about them.
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Idk if im overthinking. I am thinking he regrets his descion, because he used to see me all week, he sleeps in day so he didn't have much social communication with anyone else. The second time wont be the same, and if he doesnt seem to improve I will end it, or if he hurts me again my friends will have a word with him.
 
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