Philosophizing

[that one chick]

here is a rare moment where i’ll actually open up on the internet, something i find tacky & frankly disgusting…

its actually ironic that u share this with me… there was once upon a time i could argue i cared too much, a time in my life where i focused on making everyone else happy while my happiness was side lined…

i had to learn to luv myself, bc no one was giving me the luv i felt i deserved, i had to learn to put myself first bc no one else was willing to put me first like i has put them… i spent essentially my entire teens developing myself, & mastering my aesthetic, honing my personality, & growing into being the young woman i am today… rly, the only ones now who i will put their happiness before mine, is my family bc they gave me the same respect all my life but that is the exception not the extent...

bc ceasing to burden myself with the woes, problems, concerns, or feelings of other ppl & focusing on my happiness & luving myself & being the complete opposite of wat is expected of me, never holding back on doing or getting what i want or need, & never biting my tongue always saying exactly wat im thinking about regardless of wat that is or how it may affect someone else has made me a much much much happier angel…

im never mean, unless the other person deserves it & ill respect an individual who respects me in return… i do care about other ppl not caring about other ppl isnt wat i meant, wat i mean is ppl has never treated others how they want to be treated ppl treat others how they want to treat them & generally never face any consequences for it…

hope this helps u understand me better babe ~

Thanks for sharing, it truly is refreshing to read something so honest and personal. I totally get it. Like I said, been there, done that. It definitely can leave you feeling bitter and alone when people are so selfish and don't acknowledge the efforts you've made. However, your predetermined ideas also stop you from getting to know good, decent people who are completely worthy of your respect -- which is the point I'm getting at. This world isn't all about you, but sometimes it takes time to find the right people to devote yourself to. At least you have your family and do admit to caring about them, so you're not actually hopeless and all about yourself like you previously suggested.

Look, I don't have a problem with the fact that you love yourself. Everyone should! I just don't believe in closing yourself off to bringing potentially good people into your life because of the assholes. Why give them the power?