Sorry to hear you felt the need to spend less time here, SexyCheryl. I don't know why they chose to attack you, but I doubt this is your fault. People conform to groups, especially in the online world of narcissism and depersonalization. As Heraclitus said: "Even dogs bark at strangers." People are irrational creatures driven by emotion, often against those they don't know. I just think of them as barking dogs ; )
The first thing I do is work out if the person is hostile or not. If they are hostile, then they are dogs; if not, then I might learn something. In either case, I don't frame things as "hurtful" or "offensive" or "insulting" because that makes things more than they are. It isn't an "insult" to call a hirsute or bald man bald ; ) The truth is the truth, and lies can be discarded.
Psychologists think we focus too much on the things that upset us. This creates a cycle of acute awareness and stress which makes things said more than they are, increasing their sting and reducing our powers. Csikszentmihalyi suggests that we be objective rather than self-conscious, look for solutions, and think in an analytic way about our experience. How did things arise? What caused this? How can I avoid this in future?
We can personalize and take too much responsibility when this is often more about them. Look at these people and ask whether they deserve your time, let alone the power to make you feel bad. Seneca said that the source of insults are often overgrown children. When you know these are dogs, then you can just laugh and forget it - no need to dwell on them.
