Offensive jokes thread

Akrta said:
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Ralph Macchio 80S Movies GIF

Karate Kid Wax On Wax Off GIF by Filmin
wax on wax off karate kid lol
 
SerenityMoon said:
I was at my bank today waiting in a short line. There was just one lady in front of me, an Asian lady, who was trying to exchange yen for dollars. It was obvious she was a little irritated. She asked the teller, "Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla of yen. Today I only get hunat eighty? Why it change?" The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, "Fluctuations." The Asian lady says, "Fluc you white people too!"
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My parents did that before when they visited America 😂
 
What did John Rolfe say to Pocahontas before they got married?

Stockholm syndrome is pretty nice this time of year.
 
Son: Dad, if I told you I was gay, would you still love me?
Dad: Don’t be silly son, you were an accident. I never loved you in the first place.
 
Q: “What’s black and white and red all over?”
A: “A crushed nun!”

Q: “What’s that black stuff between an elephants toes?”
A: Slow natives.”
 
A man walks into an enchanted forest and tries to cut down a talking tree. "You can't cut me down," the tree exclaims, "I'm a talking tree!" The man responds, "You may be a talking tree, but you will dialogue."
 
Less of a joke but an offensive joke I said when I was still awake early.
It was awake bout 8am and I still hadn't slept.

I said something along the lines of "another hour and 11 minutes, it will be 9:11am. The only tragedy being that I am still awake."
 
I’ve deleted the phone numbers of all the Germans I know from my mobile phone. Now it’s Hans free.

A butcher accidentally backed into his meat grinder and got a little behind in his work that day.
 
@purplerose feet are so crusty I asked her what was for dinner and she put her foot on the table and said corn.

BlackLivesMatter said:
What do you call a ginger woman who gets called for a date? Answer surprised.
Why do red heads never have mirrors? Answer they are soulless and cast no reflection.
What do you call a guy walking arm in arm with a red head woman? Answer Hostage.
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You know why sharks don't eat black people? Because they think it's whale sh*t
 
Mary turned to Joseph on their wedding night and said, "Dear husband, I can't lay with you because I am carrying the son of God." Joseph being a pious and dutiful man was by Mary's side all the way. The night Mary went into labor Joseph While swaddling the baby Jesus, Joseph stoking his beard and startling Mary when he shouted out "Well Damn." Mary gasps and cried out, "What is wrong with the baby?"
Joseph said, "Oh the baby is fine hear him cry out for you, he has ten fingers and toes. It's just that I wasn't expecting that God was black>"
 
A man gets on a bus, and ends up sitting next to a very attractive nun. Enamored with her, he asks if he can have sex with her. Naturally, she says no, and gets off the bus. The man goes to the bus driver and asks him if he knows of a way for him to have sex with the nun. "Well," says the bus driver, "every night at 8 o'clock, she goes to the cemetery to pray. If you dress up as God, I'm sure you could convince her to have sex with you." The man decides to try it, and dresses up in his best God costume. At eight, he sees the nun and appears before her. "Oh, God!" she exclaims. "Take me with you!" The man tells the nun that she must first have sex with him to prove her loyalty. The nun says yes, but tells him she prefers anal sex. Before you know it, they're getting down to it, having nasty, grunty, loud sex. After it's over, the man pulls off his God disguise. "Ha, ha!" he says, "I'm the man from the bus!" "Ha, ha!" says the nun, removing her costume, "I'm the bus driver!"

HMRC
 
"Mummy Mummy,am I a pyromaniac"?

Yes you arson.

"Mummy Mummy,why is Daddy zigzagging across the lawn"?.

Shut your mouth son and reload.

I was in a band once in my local nightclub..

No no no sorry..I was banned from my local nightclub once.
 
What is the difference between a bowling ball and a ginger lady?
at least you can eat a bowling ball if you had to.

These two are for My Birthday Moth January
What did the old eraser and Jesus have in common?
Both died correcting your mistakes.

What is the difference between Jesus and a hooker>
The hooker does not hang around after getting nailed.
 
I won a dancing competition once..

I only got up to go to the toilet..

Apparently 6 million Jews went by train to the death camp

Must have been a fucking big train.

Hitler didn't kill himself...it was the shock of his gas bill.

What is the difference between pride parades and a bucket of s h i t.....the bucket..

I wonder if Jews still take showers and put gas in their car..or are they more concerned about oppressing Palestinians.
 
Trans students will be forced into the wrong toilets under new tory guidelines, hopefully head first just like the good old days.
 
True Story,
A Trump supporter messaged Stormy Daniels and said "Donald Trump would not touch you with a ten foot pole."
Stormy replied to the message saying,
"That is true, he used a 3 inch one."
 
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I have found the solution for gender confusion, kick them in the balls
 
Nothing is more offensive, apparently, than the two posts I made that got deleted without warning. More offensive than the anti-trans and racist posts made by a bigot and supported by a fascist.

Ha, what a joke.
 
StubleU said:
Nothing is more offensive, apparently, than the two posts I made that got deleted without warning. More offensive than the anti-trans and racist posts made by a bigot and supported by a fascist.

Ha, what a joke.
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The Daily Show Wow GIF by The Daily Show with Trevor Noah
 
I asked the surgeon if I could administer my own anesthetic, they said: go ahead, knock yourself out.

I used to have a job at a calendar factory but I got the sack because I took a couple of days off.
 
A man has an accident with his new Ferrari.

The police arrive and the man distraughtly yells at the officer "my brand new car is gone"
The police man tells him that hes so materialistic that he doesnt even realise his left arm has been severed.
The man looks at his left arm and yells OMG my rolex is gone!
 
Bread. said:
A man has an accident with his new Ferrari.

The police arrive and the man distraughtly yells at the officer "my brand new car is gone"
The police man tells him that hes so materialistic that he doesnt even realise his left arm has been severed.
The man looks at his left arm and yells OMG my rolex is gone!
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I had wholemeal bread and I thort of youu

will you be my maldito and I your maldita?
 
Why is no one friends with Dracula? Because he's a pain in the neck.

What kind of music do planets listen to? Nep-tunes.
 
I voted no but should change my vote. I never go to chat anymore but it would be fun to troll a Jesus room.
You know if you live without sin Jesus died for nothing.
Question, Why did God create man?
Answer, Because a vibrator can't mow the lawn.
I got a million of them.

-Luka said:
Banned on sight when the room is up and running for that comment. 🤣
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I take my trolling seriously. I was the first Lesbian Chat Troll.
Question why did God create man before woman?
Answer because he did not want someone nagging him about his new creation.

Why was Jesus not born in America?
Answer, because it was impossible to find 3 wise men and a virgin.
 
Santa Claus decided to stay clear of Indonesia during the Christmas period in 2004.

Instead he gave them a huge wave.

Dindu Nuffin said:
Santa Claus decided to stay clear of Indonesia during the Christmas period in 2004.

Instead he gave them a huge wave.
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Come here ya focking ginger 🤣🤣🤣

What is the difference between a jewellery thief and a peeping tom?

One snatches watches, while the other one watches... you get the idea
 
What do you call 2 Chinese lesbians? Migeater

What do you do if you see Jesus in the street? Hand him a bible and say "Jesus Christ, this is your life"
 
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